Why I Can’t Repost Your Cute Memes

Sometimes it’s no fun being a writer. Take, for instance, memes.

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I want to participate in the jollity. I, too, would like to pass along your funny/cute/poignant/scathing/pithy sayings and photos.

I read them. I laugh (sometimes). I hover over the “Share” button.

But then I do this.

layinlaundry2
Not unless you’re making a laundry nest and laying eggs…

I’m not a grammar nazi by nature. I don’t silently correct your grammar while I’m chatting with you. I don’t re-write your emails or mark up your memos.

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Next lesson: the definition of irony.

I’m not a hater.

religion
It’s not a religious issue, I swear.

I’m not your grammar mother.

mom2
“But Mommm, when is it uppercase?”

I know it’s incredibly annoying when other people correct my grammar.

your2
“That’s no way to win friends and influence people, Billy.”

Because no one wants to live under the constant scrutiny of Big Brother.

govt
“Under tyranny it is right to be a rebel!” ―Robert Fanney

And incessant nit-picking of others is a short path to a lonely existence.

ghost
“But what about the Oxford comma?” “Technically, it’s okay to leave it out if you have a list with an ampersand. Then again…” “Sorry I asked…”

I’m not like that. I’m not an authoritarian. I’m a helper, a nurturer.

girl
Because, puppies! And good grammar.*

But I can’t seem to stop myself.

So this is my apology to you.

I cannot go forth and populate the earth with your clever memes. I cannot gambol and cavort with the full-loving masses, nor contribute to the frivolity.

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Finger quotes.

 


I expect you to read my books and point out every grammatical error now. Every. Single. Book.

*My friend, Bob, points out that “who” versus “that” is a matter of personal preference. Fine. Whatever. Go buy his books, too.

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